Episode #5 “When does ego or fantasy become bigger than who we are! That we can’t control it!”

“When does ego or fantasy become bigger than who we are! That we can’t control it!”

Those fantasies those relationships allow you to better love yourself. When I say love I speak of acceptance into your ego! Those people who are happy to a point with their looks date people who are okay looking.

  I speak of extremes. Your ego is attached to your fantasy and if not Checked can mislead you into thinking it is reality. Because you have attached that fantasy into your everyday lifestyle partly because you dreamed it of it!

Some of us perceive ourselves to be a certain way or look a certain way or act a certain way. Some of us are loud because that is the only way people like us or we perceive them to like us because they laugh and are amused. Entertaining in fact.

  You can live your life according to your fantasy for a very long time. But it will always come with a setback a cord. One day someone will pull it down and you will realize nothing you have come from love. In fact, nothing really existed.

Sometimes men want to be taller so they are attracted to taller woman. That is what I speak of when I say “Fantasy.” Some of us didn’t have many friends so we attached that “Like,” to having more money. Also, a part of your ego. So, when is it wrong to have an ego and when does it feel to be okay? Is it? Perhaps when we live through our ego and constantly walk in this fantasy. But the affect it has on others could sometimes be beneficial. Some people find that edification.

We sell that part of ourselves as being attractive.

When does your ego actually become more attractive than you? Your persona or is it you are coming out of to show the world who you really are. Your ego becomes more attractive when you can actually see yourself acting. It’s like you are watching yourself in a movie. You can see that people like the other person more than they like you. If you met your favorite actor perhaps you wouldn’t like them unless they re-enact a script you enjoyed.

Seems that your ego gets you paid. How is that? For most of us we spend our days at work pretending. If you’re not liked much than you probably don’t pretend. Perhaps people look at you in disbelief. Truth is most of us don’t like the people we work with. We spend those days acting so others will like us. I have noticed that this remote working has allowed people to be themselves therefore not needing to act for you to like them.

Some people say be humble but how do you know when your humble enough? Especially when that check gets you more than it would have if you were pretending. I remember this verse from Jay-z a long time ago referring himself to the rapper Common and saying I changed my rap style as if it were common sense. So, pretending at work has become a different you! Perhaps that is why you are so tired when you get home. Lol.

Speaking on a relationships of man/woman when a man chases you because of how you look he is only chasing his fantasy. That which builds his ego! How long you think before that relationship becomes toxic and unloving? Truth is he is only lusting or chasing what he believes you are. Sometimes even our fantasies come with an addiction. If you like or enjoy the attention you may get more attention pretending to be someone else or be with someone you would not normally date.

Fantasies give us more power than what we truly have. That power as it becomes addictive makes us think that our behavior can be as polite or gross as we want. That perhaps we can talk to people in any way we please. But this is only when you fantasy has taken full throttle in the driving seat. An example if you believe me or not is the Will Smith and Chris Rock altercation. His fantasy of who he believed to be at that moment became inflated with the idea -self-consciously that he made it. Why do I say that because he was also receiving an award that night. So, his ego/slash fantasy made him believe that he could do that. He didn’t have a break down in that moment he has an extreme adrenaline-ego rush!

I assure you before Will Smith hit Chris Rock he saw himself doing it. That is the fantasy.

The detriment of having superior fantasies where you are that “Person,” is dangerous to everyone. Mostly in the end yourself. You will have many people leaving you desperate. Even though those that believed they can control the “Ego or you.”

Having these fantasies and trying to live through them without having to say it is very dangerous to your everyday life-and long term life.

How do you know when you are living in this fantasy/ego world? Pay attention to your behavior. Does it feel “All powerful?” Does it need to always control things? Does being better than others give you the feeling to look down at others. Do you act as if you own things that don’t belong to you? Are you quick to claim things or become bossy with things that give you power? Do you constantly use the word “My,” with things that you were told to only look after? Because if you do that is a “Master-slave,” relationship you seek.

Everything you come in contact with must be under your possession or control in order to operate correctly.

Perhaps you have fantasies of being a pharaoh.

I speak of dreams because many get bothered by them or they react as if the day will be good because you had a good dream. Don’t let your dreams control your emotions. Again, dreams are a manifestation of what you may or will grow through.

Going back to fantasies. Are they are usually a symbol of what we are running from. Can you detect when a fantasy isn’t a dream that you need but have manifested through what you negatively desire. The main character of a fantasy usually possesses that ego. The ego of control. I can understand that many people use that Ego to do things that they couldn’t normally. So, for them the ego gets shut off at some point. If you can shut down such an emotion that must be fed how could you be living in reality. That is a constant going back and forth. Yes you may be earning but how many people did that dragon need to kill.

Reality doesn’t want you to start at the bottom. But the reality is you must with anything you do.

So, they like it. Would wear it for free, but don’t buy it? Why? Because their money is valuable to them. What are they getting with the clothing?

When you live in a fantasy many believe you will become unrecognizable, but your fantasy is a part of you but on drugs. So, you will see yourself as you relate (that which also becomes a relationship). Fantasies will always keep you from realities success for your life. Because it will not require you to work only dream and make up situations. Real work will always come with pain. The pain is the part that makes your dreams a reality. Pain alters your perception and focuses more on your dreams. Also giving you a forcefield to protect you. As long as you see yourself in your future you will not feel most of the pain in the present. 

Dreams are part of your plan. Dreams are the like the colors in your painting colorful and bright full. When your perception is altered your emotions tend to cooperate positively.

Fantasies always bring some hurt. Pain in dreams is side effect of a dream as Hurt is the disappointment of your slow process and negative results. There is no disappointment in a dream only the vision of its completion.

Fantasies are dissatisfying because they take your hurt as a reason to seek revenge therefore eventually falling into or remaining in malice.

As for a dream comes from a seed of wanting to become something great so, it doesn’t need a reason bigger than “I want.”

  Thank you for listening. I am my brother’s keeper.